My Advice of the Day:

If you harbor a strong dislike toward foreigners, do not become a tour guide.

This past Wednesday, Dutch Social Policy class and several other CIEE'ers braved the way too early morning hours and a two hour bus ride to witness the Dutch ingenuity that keeps the North Sea out of the Netherlands: Deltaworks. A system of dams and emergency water gates, our excursion to Deltaworks in Zeeland corresponded with our weekly topic, water management. With 1/3 to 1/2 the country below sea level (depending on who you're talking to, the level of the tides, and the location within the NLS), its pretty important to have some protection. With the inevitable threat of global warming on the horizon, the Dutch are arguably the best prepared, and are going to have to lend some advice to our sorry asses across the Atlantic.

But, I had a point, so let's return to that. We set off on our tour, and within 10 minutes of being in Zeeland, the Dutch hostility begins. Now, I have encountered several occurrences of this Dutch hostility before (see also, man in bread line on Koninginnedag). Walking between the tour guide (who never introduced himself) and Bonny, Lenore and I are discussing that fact that CIEE never told us where the hospitals are in Amsterdam. Segueing, I recount the ElectronicA Museum story, where I was happy to discover the word "pacemaker" does not change in Dutch, but it would probably serve me better if I knew more Dutch. We continue to converse about how it is hard to learn Dutch when the Amsterdammers are such accommodating neighbors - even when you speak Dutch to them, they often resort to English, because it’s easier.

WELL - Mr. Tour Guide decides to crashingly enter a conversation he was neither part of nor invited to join, and begins to rail on about how shouldn't we be learning the language of the country we're in (um, trying!) and then have the nerve to say:

"Well, only England speaks English."

Um. WHAT? Who are you? What is your issue? If you have begun drinking already today, please be kind enough to share, so this will make sense to the rest of us.

He concedes on that but begrudgingly insists, "Well, England and only North America."

ONLY North America. Let's take a moment and review some stats.

Population of North America (US, Mexico, Canada): 442,363,940
Population of the Netherlands: 16,491,461

And I'm being forgiving; I didn't bother bringing the population of the UK into this. Anyways, he persists in arguing with Lenore; I f'ing clear out, I am not fighting with a Dutchman this early in the day. Ironically enough, Lenore is Antillean, her father speaks Dutch, and she is arguably putting more effort into learning the language than any of us. Nice job, angry Dutchman.

After he gave us a tour (his English wasn't that good, I'm that played a part in his hatred toward it and us) he cleared out ridiculously fast, leaving us in the doorway of a dam. It's great to be hated because you come from the only remaining superpower in the world and happen to speak what has been recently declared the most widespread language the world has ever seen. (I read an article in the Int'l Times that suggests no other language will ever dominate the way English currently does; it has surpassed the linga francas of the past: French, Sanskrit, and Latin).

In all fairness, over lunch Bonny reveals the man "hated him first!" It appears that the man had a bit of an inferiority complex - Bonny suspected he had never been to university and A'dammers are viewed as having attitude problems - and had been rude to Bonny right off the start. Apparently, he just hates everyone. Whew, I can sleep better knowing that.